yeah... birds.

May 21 2012

non-nude strip club in five acts.

ACT I
girl 1: so what’s yr name?
me: chris, yours?
girl 1: E*73837*&#
me: what?
girl 1: E(u308u0
me: what?
girl 1: E8*80h3t8h
me: what?
girl 1: eden, like the garden.
me: oh! nice to meet you.
exit eden.

ACT II
girl 2: so you’re like a punk rawker!
me: …
girl 2: are you wearing eyeliner?
me: yes.
girl 2: why?
me: because i like it, and hey, you are too!
girl 2: yeah but only because i have to, i hate it.
me: well, i’ll wear yours for you.
girl 2: ha.. ha….ha………………………………..
exit girl 2.

ACT III
girl 3: so what’s yr name?
me: chris, yours?
girl 3: eoiwhtoihwet
me: nice to meet you.
girl 3: wanna go have some fun?
me: what?
girl 3: wanna go have some fun?
me: no, sorry.
exit girl 3.

ACT IV
enter korra. she has been around often for chats. she’s a sophomore at U of I for marketing or some shit and wants to go to law school.
korra: this job is so easy. just move yr tits around yep.
me: hah yeah, if i was a woman i’d totally do it too.
korra: lots of guys say that.
me: well, i actually wish i was a woman.
korra: …
me: …
exit korra.

ACT V
girl 4: hey so is this your first time here?
me: yep.
girl 4: oooooh i loooove virgins.
me: …
girl 4: are you in a band?
me: not now, no.
girl 4: why not?
me: moving back and forth for college.
girl 4: what instruments do you play?
me: guitar and drums.
girl 4: oh wow! those are like… totally different!
me: yeeeeeah.
girl 4: so why are you here?
me: them. and i’m depressed.
girl 4: well maybe i can help you with that…
me: no, i don’t think you can.
girl 4: aww, well i’m sorry to hear that.
me: me too.
exit girl 4.

enter korra.
korra: so that last one was up on you a bit, give me a turn. can i interest you in a graduation dance?
me: ha, no thanks.
korra: aww why not?
me: i’m broke as shit.
korra: … 
me: SEE THESE JEANS? YOU THINK THIS HOLE IS A FASHION STATEMENT?
korra: …
me: NO. IT’S FROM WEARING THE SAME JEANS EVERYDAY FOR OVER A YEAR.
korra: ah well…
exit korra.

end.

4 notes

  1. happycake1000 said: I’m gonna need some background on this
  2. yeahbirds posted this
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